Is it necessary to have feelings before you get married?

I think feelings is not a guarantee to a happy marriage, if it was, why is that many couple who were once in love eventually broke up? Many men who are up to a marriageable age and financially ready are complaining bitterly of not haven found a suitable wife. Why is that? It's because many of them are waiting to fall in love. They don't know these 3 things about love:
1. Love is divine.
2. Love grows gradually
3. Love eventually comes when you give kindness, care and make sacrifices for your partner.

You must start working on yourself. Learn from your friends the things they don't like about you by asking for their honest opinion. Then ask for God's intervention to convert those vices you possess to virtues. You can't change by yourself without help from the Holy Spirit. Even if you attempt to change your bad attributes by making conscious effort, you will still see yourself returning to them.  It is not just possible, I'm talking from my experience.

Everyone like good things, so if have loads of good attributes, people will naturally get attracted to you including the opposite sex.  Your biggest challenge shouldn't be to get rich, it should be to keep working on yourself till you are good enough to attract everything good and money is not an exception.

It can't be hard for you to find a suitable wife if you are suitable for a good wife. It will happen naturally. Good things ever hardly comes easy,  so to change from your bad attributes requires a lot of effort and sacrifices. You must sacrifice your pride. Learn to be happy when others are.   Choose to play the fool so that peace will reign.  Just know that you are working on becoming the person you are looking for in your partner.

If you like someone, then it's enough to give the person a chance in your life, not as your girlfriend but close friend. Don't expect sex or immoralities.  Doing good for someone you like consistently without expecting anything in  return is a sure way to lure any heart to fall in love with you.


Our problem is that we are not ready to make sacrifices yet we want the other person to make the sacrifice. I will give an example, I like this guy so much, in fact! I am attracted to him, without expecting anything in return such as him becoming my boyfriend or proposing marriage to me,  I should just do  good to him consistently. I can visit him and cook for him, we can hang out together to gist, and I should be able to pay for the both of us because we are not dating, I should help him get relief of any of his problem that I can handle. I should do all these and even more without expecting anything in return.

He definitely will end up liking me back but mustn't become my boyfriend or husband. I should just be contempted with any level our friendship gets to.  But this is not easy to practice because along the line, my likeness could give birth to emotions/feelings and if I am not  careful, I might start lunging for his hug,  kisses,  and Conc romance which might destroy the true friendship we should have built. So what have I been saying? My point is,  likeness, good attitude and compatibility is all you should seek for if you are ready to settle down.

If you see a woman you like, and her attitude is good and you both are compatible, please marry her even if you are not in love with her, the love will naturally come.